I [F] just wanted to drop you an image of my little guy [M] in his happy place between my thighs. Don't give up hope. Gentle/Mommy Dommes exist and/or may be cultivated. Know what you want and seek it, craft it.
It's okay to want a hug or to rest in a lap. It doesn't make you less dominant to need comfort. It's okay to need a shoulder to cry on. I hope you're doing okay and if not we can change that :)