Sir, If it pleases you to read this promotional correspondence,The lingua ligatum is a fully automatic machine that engages in a most unhygienic practice for the benefit of your wife. Made of gutta-percha & India rubber, this realistic device is extr nudes
Sirs, A most hearty welcome to all newcomers! I see that our club has received a further 300 new members in the first 5 days of this new year alone. All are welcome here! I have instructed maid Dottie to put extra coal on the fire to warm you all.
Sir, an increase in maids with infirmities such as rickets do trouble me, as they are unable to perform their work to a satisfactory degree. I have therefore introduced a test which new maids must pass. Such is its importance that I have decreed to super
Sir, that blaggard greengrocer do visit , hawking his marrows, cucumbers and carrots. I instruct my staff not to fall for his salesman's charm. Cook tells me that she has her own special method for determining the quality of such goods. I defer to her e
Sir, Please to be on the look-out for witchcraft or devilry this dark night. Pagan ceremonies do take place which would chill the God fearing man to his marrow. Though I do note that some aspects of their rituals are most interesting to observe.
Sir, As a progressive employer I do seek to educate my staff. Whilst we are heading for the cold winter in the Northern hemisphere, the Southern parts of the empire do enter into warmth. I take my time to explain this concept to maid Elspeth, who do ask
Sir, I wish to complain upon my recent purchase of a Summer Chair ("Sommarsäte") from messrs Kamprad & Sons, whereupon I do find it most lacking in support and comfort. I enclose an illustration of my Maid who does significantly depress the cushio
Sirs et Madames, A very warm welcome to all new members of our fine club - 255 of you joined this past evening, a numeric value which got Mr Babbage most excited. My secretary is busy preparing membership cards for all, please to be a little patient. Wel
Sir, As a reward for their service I have on occasion permitted some of my staff to use my indoor skiitles. Judging for the noises that I hear from below starirs it has proved a most popular game.
