Messieurs et Madames, I am sure you will be most delighted to learn that our club is once more open, and I invite you all to enjoy a fine wine or brandy with me this evening. My staff have been practising a splendid dance display, which they will perform nudes
Sir, I receive a letter from Gussy Herbert, who is currently on government work overseas. "I have grown the best moustache. It is the most fashionable style these days". He encloses a photo. I am uncertain whose whiskers are the most impressive, but I
Sir, an increase in maids with infirmities such as rickets do trouble me, as they are unable to perform their work to a satisfactory degree. I have therefore introduced a test which new maids must pass. Such is its importance that I have decreed to super
Sir, After a rendition of Mozart I conclude that the harpsichord is much in need of a tuner. I have glanced at the leaflet that came from the manufacturer but the proceedure seems very technical.
Sir, A communique from my friend 'Gussy' Herbert, presently embracing the cultural delights of Paris. He is saving money by sharing his Dollymop with two other clients. Gussy (reclining) appears most overwhelmed by the experience.
Dear Hubby, Most unfortunately our maid Bonny is yet again disruptive. Unfortunately I’ve been most busy with my ladies club, and tasked our governess Nanny to discipline her in my stead.
Sir, Noises from below stairs at 2am. I creep down with my service revolver, to discover maid Beatrice with that blaggard greengrocer. He has given her a hat 'similar to which the ladies do wear' and is giving her much more at which point I do interven
Sir, I instruct Maid Jenny to adjust Lady B____'s screen, which is out of position. The maid quickly attends, but with her clothing dirtied from her earlier grate polishing duties, I do fear for the cleanliness of Lady B___'s furniture. A solution is s