Messieurs et Madames, I am sure you will be most delighted to learn that our club is once more open, and I invite you all to enjoy a fine wine or brandy with me this evening. My staff have been practising a splendid dance display, which they will perform nudes
Madames et Monsieurs, I have been censured over my last missive. I may have been hoodwinked by a charlatan offering images made by the Devil's own hand. To make amends I shall insist on only the finest mosaics from antiquity
My Dear Henny, I think it’s a wonderful idea for your tea club hosting a charity show! I think circus and vaudeville acts are a sure-fire way to drum up interest, and I am delighted in assisting in finding acts to assist. Your friend Vera has the makin
Sir, that blaggard greengrocer do visit , hawking his marrows, cucumbers and carrots. I instruct my staff not to fall for his salesman's charm. Cook tells me that she has her own special method for determining the quality of such goods. I defer to her e
Sir, my Housekeeper has neglected to place an order for cotton cloths; as such the maids claim they are unable to do further cleaning. I swiftly intervene before this laziness takes hold of the entire house. The ragged clothing of my staff makes a fine s
Sir, I may from time to time complain about the behaviour and laziness of my staff, but I wish here to pay compliment to maids Rosie and Bethany, who both do admirably warm my brandy and extinguish the candle before bed. To watch them is proof of how muc
Sir, Over luncheon the Lady of the house sees fit to take me to task. She claims that my letter to the Postmaster is unwarranted for the new Postman is a fine upstanding young fellow. I note that he did deliver a telegram this morning with some urgency.
Sir, Gussy Herbert do send, by the Queen's post, a most modern "Christmas Greeting Card", within which he inscribes : 'A Merry Yule, you fool! May you get all you desire. I know I did!' He notes that 'Swells Academy' have a 2-for-1 offer upon Tues
Sir, Dr Mesmer visits from Germany and brings news of his scientific principle, whereupon he can command any to do as he desires. "For healing", he insists. Over a large Brandy, I do persuade him to cause my servants to believe they are swimming. It is