Sir, Noises from below stairs at 2am. I creep down with my service revolver, to discover maid Beatrice with that blaggard greengrocer. He has given her a hat 'similar to which the ladies do wear' and is giving her much more at which point I do interven nudes
Sir, Gussy Herbert do visit and brings great festive cheer to the house. He gives me a gift - a fine print entitled "Connoisseurs" by Thomas Rowlandson. Gussy says that this picture do remind him perfectly of myself, but I do not see the similarity at
Sir, A wager : I do bet that maid Lottie cannot sit comfortably upon the chair without touching seat cushion or seat back. Her early attempts have clothing touching said cushions and thus forfeit, but a final wager brings a new technique and she wins two
Sir, I receive a letter by Empire Mail from Gussy Herbert. He writes : "Hiring new staff. Was unable to choose and so I hired all of them. Three pretty maids all in a row, eh what?". I do briefly consider hiring fresh staff such as these, but Lady B_
Dear ladies, there are few choices as important as your choice of a lady's maid! Speaking from experience, I advise you to test all candidates most thoroughly for such virtues as cleanliness, honesty, comeliness and willingness to get very personal with
My maids are in a state of some great excitement in anticipating the arrival of their "Father Christmas". I assure them that he will visit each of them in turn this night, to give them a most enjoyable gift. I will be exhausted come morningtide!
Sir, the lady of the house expresses her disatisfaction with her weighing scales. A new type of bathroom machine arrives from Avery & Co. Upon reading the fine illustrated instructions it appears robust enough for two or more persons.
Sir, I have hired two Italian chefs to give my luncheon greater variety. The chefs are currently banging and crashing around in the kitchen - presumably the Italian way - and I am in great anticipation of what exciting new experiences they may introduce