Gentlemen, I am most perplexed. Having commissioned a portrait of my fiancee, I was shocked when presented with this (admittedly fine and lovely) life-size rendering of her in a most odalisque pose. I naturally anticipated viewing her in this state only nudes
Sir, with the forthcoming New Year's celebrations some of the staff ask permission to perform a Mummers Play. I am quite content with the spectacle but insist that reherasls are performed. Costumes are quite unnessecary at the stage.
Sir, the lady of the house expresses her disatisfaction with her weighing scales. A new type of bathroom machine arrives from Avery & Co. Upon reading the fine illustrated instructions it appears robust enough for two or more persons.
To the Postmaster General, Im writing to you this very morning in praise of our new telegram boy. I find him to be the most dilligent and courteous fellow imaginable and I oft see him cycling up the drive whistling a cheery tune with a smile on his face.
Gentlemen, be aware that competition for an open position may become quite fierce if your salary far exceeds the norm. The situation was most entertaining, albeit distressing to see such beauty in peril.
Sir, Daisy, my new maid, does exclaim that she is most tired and exhausted from her work. Fearing her imminent collapse, I sit her down upon a nearby table to rest. I sit opposite her for a good thirty minutes or more, to ensure that she is fully recover
Sir, It is a miracle of our age that the Safety Bicycle is such an affordable means of transportation. Why, even maid Bella did recently buy one. Admittedly she pawned her clothing, as I would not give her a raise in pay, but this does not stop her from
Sir, Having filled the cellar with wines,spirits & brandies, I find myself short on funds. Laundry seems excessively expensive, but a philanthropist like myself would never ask staff to pay for their clothing to be washed. Thus I devise an alternativ
Sir, I write in haste and with some little secrecy; located as I am upon a straw paillasse within the boathouse. I unexpectedly found myself in the presence of a disrobed maid. I have yet to provide an explanation which might quell the ire of Lady B___.