Gentlemen, I am most perplexed. Having commissioned a portrait of my fiancee, I was shocked when presented with this (admittedly fine and lovely) life-size rendering of her in a most odalisque pose. I naturally anticipated viewing her in this state only nudes
Today maid Lottie did spill a whole bottle of ink down her tunic. She starts to cry, she cannot afford a new dress. "Does your dress, or lack thereof, affect or impede your ability to clean?" "No, sir". "Well then, I think we have a solution to your
Sir, Gussy Herbert informs me that, on the continent, the pastime of smoking tobacco and other substances is becoming increasingly popular among the fairer sex. I do find this hard to believe, but Gussy subsequently provides convincing evidence of this
Sir, Lord Rollright of Shipton do visit, bringing strange prophecies of the future still to come. He 'sees' many folk holding a curious looking glass - one which shows not a reflection of the self, but pictures of the gentle sex without clothing. Rollr
Lady B___ do oft enquire why I spend so much time in my library. It is, I explain, because I study my books therein. There is so much knowledge and learning to be found within. Historical documents of times past that can oft educate us to satisfaction
Sir, A great commotion in the night causes me to rush downstairs fearing intruders. I am relieved to find only maids Agnes and Elsie. They quickly explain how they are affeared of fire and conflagration; they do seek to extinguish any naked flames before
Sir, I must confer, I would not usually approve of discovering a lady sitting alone within a public drinking house. As a progressive mind, however, I do find myself making some exceptions to this opinion.
Sir, a letter from Gussy Herbert by the Queen's Empire mail. He is at work developing new trade deals, and speaks highly of a triple alliance that he has developed.