Sir, A letter arrives from Gussy Herbert, who is in great excitement. He declares that he has discovered a new and economical method of contraception, and promises to forward particulars with a view to patenting his system. I remain to be convinced, but
Sir, I am awoken in the early hours by the smell of smoke and much calamity. I race downstrairs in my undergarments. Much to my relief, cook has summoned the fire brigade and has the matter in hand.
Sir, I instruct Maid Jenny to adjust Lady B____'s screen, which is out of position. The maid quickly attends, but with her clothing dirtied from her earlier grate polishing duties, I do fear for the cleanliness of Lady B___'s furniture. A solution is s
Sirs et Madames, I apologise most profusely for the recent appearance of promotional handbills for strumpetry that have been left scattered around our club by tawdry urchins. The staff responsible for granting entry to said urchins have been punished.
Dear Henny, whilst in London Town I’ve gone to Sotheby’s booksellers, they’ve granted me access to their statue collection, and I’m seeing to the possible acquisition of one, a wonderful Satyr piece. A daguerreotype is enclosed, with my assistant
Sir, Encouraged by other members of this esteemed club I have obtained a brochure from Mssrs Thos Cook and Sons. The 'Nile Voyage' offers a paddle steamer cruise to Luxor and Aswan. I enclose details of the First Class Smoking Lounge.
My dear hubby, my lady’s maid Bonny has continued in her disruptive behavior. Desiring to correct this still, I’ve traded the switch for the birching. I fear I may be playing into her hysteric behavior, as she rarely seems to actually be chastised.
Sir, I must state it most plainly : I do not favour the modern 'impressionist' style of art. If a painting is to be enjoyed and admired, it must be of the utmost realism.
