*Press Release* Clinical studies have proven that the concept of 'blue balls' is a myth. In reality, it is just entitled pigs having a tantrum. Pigs cannot be trusted when it comes to their own sexual gratification.
Come and find me sitting in my favourite cafe, patiently and quietly with my chess set, waiting for any inferior pigs who want to test themselves and risk the utter delight of being publicly humiliated by a woman. Full details in comments.