Sir, a sarcastic comment from the vicar upon the luxurious size of my chairs "wide enough for two" leads me to test his hypothesis, hoping to disprove. And do you know, they are wide enough for two. I drop an extra shilling onto the collection plate nudes
Sir, The need has arisen for the appointment of a new maid. In addition to the usual references and letter of introduction I now demand a demonstration of their skills. This has proved most worthwhile.
Sir, I have been minded to commision an Artist to paint a portrait. Upon his arrival he insists upon setting up his easel in the drawing room, lacking inspiration he sugests that one of the maids do model for him in a variety of classical poses. I agree
Sir, Over luncheon the Lady of the house sees fit to take me to task. She claims that my letter to the Postmaster is unwarranted for the new Postman is a fine upstanding young fellow. I note that he did deliver a telegram this morning with some urgency.
Sir, The lack of education amongst the lower orders is lamentable. I have decided to permit the more promising servants to improve themselves whilst attending to their chores.
Sir, Today I receive a postcard from Gussy Herbert, who is currently in Egypt searching for lost treasures of the pharaohs. "I have uncovered some amazing finds", he writes, "You would not believe how many whores you can hire for a shilling". I raise
Sirs et Madames, A very warm welcome to all new members of our fine club - 255 of you joined this past evening, a numeric value which got Mr Babbage most excited. My secretary is busy preparing membership cards for all, please to be a little patient. Wel
Sir, My Greco-Roman mural remains incomplete after unpleasantness with the artist. This displeases me, as the water-carrier figure had not yet been painted. I then do remember that I have servants standing around idle, and so do deploy Maid Eva. I sit an
