Sir, Today I discover the identity of the sender & perpetrator of the "arse" greeting card that I received not three days past. It is none other than that blaggard greengrocer, oft loitering around my backdoor, causing disturbance among my staff. I nudes
Sirs et Madames, I apologise most profusely for the recent appearance of promotional handbills for strumpetry that have been left scattered around our club by tawdry urchins. The staff responsible for granting entry to said urchins have been punished.
Sir, the tax collector do arrive unexpectedly today, to discuss irregularities which he claims to have detected within my accounts. I assure him they are all in order, and summon maid Irene to bring my books and ledgers. And do you know, he quickly reali
Dear Sirs and Madames, I must caution you to take utmost care during your Egyptian travels. Misunderstandings abound! As a cautionary tale I present the sight that awaited me when I requested from our guide to see a mummy unwrapped.
Sirs, A most hearty welcome to all newcomers! I see that our club has received a further 300 new members in the first 5 days of this new year alone. All are welcome here! I have instructed maid Dottie to put extra coal on the fire to warm you all.
Sirs, I extend a warm welcome to all who have joined our fine club over the past few days. It is so busy that I have had to hire a new maid to prepare rules and particulars for our new members. She is doing a fine job!
Sir, with the forthcoming New Year's celebrations some of the staff ask permission to perform a Mummers Play. I am quite content with the spectacle but insist that reherasls are performed. Costumes are quite unnessecary at the stage.
Sir, My Maids do complain upon the recent hot weather, and make requests for time off. I fear that reducing their hours will reduce their take-home pay, and as a progressive employer I would not facilitate this. Another solution to working in the heat is
Sir, I do hire a new maid. She hath not uniform nor working attire, but as a progressive employer I offer to provide these at no charge. I use the latest wet collodion photographic method to ensure perfect clothing fit. This do greatly please my new maid
