Sir, Today I discover the identity of the sender & perpetrator of the "arse" greeting card that I received not three days past. It is none other than that blaggard greengrocer, oft loitering around my backdoor, causing disturbance among my staff. I nudes
Sir, Being a progressive employer I encourage the staff to entertain themselves on their monthly day off. Today I found them playing a game of statues - quite amusing.
A warm welcome to all who have arrived in our little club from the "100 year old porn found in wall" pamphlet that is doing the rounds. My secretary is busy typing up membership cards for you all as we speak. Please make yourself comfortable, we have a
Sir, I instruct Maid Jenny to adjust Lady B____'s screen, which is out of position. The maid quickly attends, but with her clothing dirtied from her earlier grate polishing duties, I do fear for the cleanliness of Lady B___'s furniture. A solution is s
Sir, Some Swedish folding chairs arrive for the Conservatoire, concerned as to their poor construction I have devised a scientific method to test their weight baring capability. They are found to be quite robust.
Messieurs et Madames, I am sure you will be most delighted to learn that our club is once more open, and I invite you all to enjoy a fine wine or brandy with me this evening. My staff have been practising a splendid dance display, which they will perform
Sir, the lady of the house expresses her disatisfaction with her weighing scales. A new type of bathroom machine arrives from Avery & Co. Upon reading the fine illustrated instructions it appears robust enough for two or more persons.