Sir, A communique arrives from Gussy Herbert, currently a government delegate in France. "Arrived in Gay Paris. Trade delegation very dull, though great success after an impromptu meeting in the carriage from Lille. Much business was done in those few nudes
Sir, My Head Gardener reports a glut of root vegetables. I have devised a method of grading the length and girth, Cook will not tolerate any sign of flacidity in the produce.
Sir, Some Swedish folding chairs arrive for the Conservatoire, concerned as to their poor construction I have devised a scientific method to test their weight baring capability. They are found to be quite robust.
Sir, Lord Dashwood do visit. A most difficult man to do business with, he drives a very hard bargain. Upon my summoning, Maid Jess then enters, and proceeds to clean the drawing room whilst Lord Dashwood enjoys a large brandy. A great deal of business
My agent in Andalusia recently recruited a new nanny. Since my boys are coming of age soon, I felt it appropriate that a physical description was provided before I agreed to hire the maid. This epistle arrived by post today, and I believe the qualificati
Madames et Monsieurs, I have been censured over my last missive. I may have been hoodwinked by a charlatan offering images made by the Devil's own hand. To make amends I shall insist on only the finest mosaics from antiquity
Sir, A picture post-card arrives from Gussy Herbert, on a trade envoy to Greece. "Am enjoying the Retsina and the unusual sports of this place. One of the wrestlers has offered to show me some of his 'moves' tomorrow night, quite exciting!". I raise
Sir, Having locked away the good Brandy, I welcome my exuberant guest, Lord Hogshead of Wort. Imbibing great quantities of my Kinahan Whisky, he does give a most animated shadow puppet display. I particularly enjoyed his "Raising of the Standard". Tomo
