Sir, My Head Gardener reports a glut of root vegetables. I have devised a method of grading the length and girth, Cook will not tolerate any sign of flacidity in the produce.
Sir, Noises from below stairs at 2am. I creep down with my service revolver, to discover maid Beatrice with that blaggard greengrocer. He has given her a hat 'similar to which the ladies do wear' and is giving her much more at which point I do interven
Gentlemen, I am most perplexed. Having commissioned a portrait of my fiancee, I was shocked when presented with this (admittedly fine and lovely) life-size rendering of her in a most odalisque pose. I naturally anticipated viewing her in this state only
Sirs et Madames, I apologise most profusely for the recent appearance of promotional handbills for strumpetry that have been left scattered around our club by tawdry urchins. The staff responsible for granting entry to said urchins have been punished.
Sir, Following a dispute with the local milliner, I find myself without anyone to repair the hat I wear for Sunday best. Maid Elly offers to help, she has previously worked in such a role. My hat is returned with a remarkable velour, and many did whisper
Sir, Encouraged by other members of this esteemed club I have obtained a brochure from Mssrs Thos Cook and Sons. The 'Nile Voyage' offers a paddle steamer cruise to Luxor and Aswan. I enclose details of the First Class Smoking Lounge.
Sir, Lady B___ do feel that the gardens are somewhat dull and lacklustre, requesting a marble statue, in a classical Greek or Roman style. The cost of such an item do cause me great consternation, but I soon put an idle servant to work which proves much
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