Sirs et Madames, We welcome all new guests to our club - over 800 of you in this past day. It has become a trifle crowded with newcomers at present, so I have opened the Dashwood room. It is a little dusty, but is most cavernous. My staff are already in nudes

Posted: 3mth ago Viewed: 16 times Liked: 0 times

Category: gonewanton

Posted by: Sir_Lord_B

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Sir, I must state it most plainly : I do not favour the modern 'impressionist' style of art. If a painting is to be enjoyed and admired, it must be of the utmost realism.

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Sirs, A most hearty welcome to all newcomers! I see that our club has received a further 300 new members in the first 5 days of this new year alone. All are welcome here! I have instructed maid Dottie to put extra coal on the fire to warm you all.

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Sir, Lord Bumford's chaufeur is a most impertenent and insolent fellow. I hear he was asking the maid for help with his starting handle.

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Sir, Over luncheon the Lady of the house sees fit to take me to task. She claims that my letter to the Postmaster is unwarranted for the new Postman is a fine upstanding young fellow. I note that he did deliver a telegram this morning with some urgency.

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An American suffragette no doubt…

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Sir, we are invited to a reading group hosted by Dame Trumpton-Hardwicke. I confess to being sceptical at first but there was one novel that caught my eye.

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Lady B___ do oft enquire why I spend so much time in my library. It is, I explain, because I study my books therein. There is so much knowledge and learning to be found within. Historical documents of times past that can oft educate us to satisfaction

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Sir, Encouraged by other members of this esteemed club I have obtained a brochure from Mssrs Thos Cook and Sons. The 'Nile Voyage' offers a paddle steamer cruise to Luxor and Aswan. I enclose details of the First Class Smoking Lounge.