Sir, Following a dispute with the local milliner, I find myself without anyone to repair the hat I wear for Sunday best. Maid Elly offers to help, she has previously worked in such a role. My hat is returned with a remarkable velour, and many did whisper nudes
Sir, My Head Gardener reports a glut of root vegetables. I have devised a method of grading the length and girth, Cook will not tolerate any sign of flacidity in the produce.
Sir, I read of the new Natural Science of "Ergonomics". By studying the interaction of the human and the world around them, improvements in comfort and efficiency may be made. I instruct maid Evelyn to stand naked as if cleaning, for me to study. To im
Sirs et Madames, A very warm welcome to all new members of our fine club - 255 of you joined this past evening, a numeric value which got Mr Babbage most excited. My secretary is busy preparing membership cards for all, please to be a little patient. Wel
Sir, with the forthcoming New Year's celebrations some of the staff ask permission to perform a Mummers Play. I am quite content with the spectacle but insist that reherasls are performed. Costumes are quite unnessecary at the stage.
Sir, Today I receive a postcard from Gussy Herbert, who is currently in Egypt searching for lost treasures of the pharaohs. "I have uncovered some amazing finds", he writes, "You would not believe how many whores you can hire for a shilling". I raise
Sir, we are invited to a reading group hosted by Dame Trumpton-Hardwicke. I confess to being sceptical at first but there was one novel that caught my eye.
Sir, My new maid is most fastidious at cleaning and polishing; my house do shine like ne'er before. She is pleased to be earning a wage that she may soon be able to afford some clothes to wear, although I have told her there is no hurry in this matter.
