Sir, I receive a letter by Empire Mail from Gussy Herbert. He writes : "Hiring new staff. Was unable to choose and so I hired all of them. Three pretty maids all in a row, eh what?". I do briefly consider hiring fresh staff such as these, but Lady B_ nudes
Sir, Lord Dashwood do visit. A most difficult man to do business with, he drives a very hard bargain. Upon my summoning, Maid Jess then enters, and proceeds to clean the drawing room whilst Lord Dashwood enjoys a large brandy. A great deal of business
Welcome to all new subscribers - around 400 new members in this past week. Our secretary is a little busy working through the member's list at the moment. If it pleases you to read the comment below this communique, I do set out a summary of the rules
Sir, Lady B____ reports a fault with her screen, whereupon it wobbles while she is dressing. "Only while dressing?" "Yes". I summon maid Harriet to assist me in recreating the problem, and do you know it took us nigh on an hour to discover the loose
Sir, the lady of the house expresses her disatisfaction with her weighing scales. A new type of bathroom machine arrives from Avery & Co. Upon reading the fine illustrated instructions it appears robust enough for two or more persons.
Messieurs et Madames, welcome all new subscribers to our little club - over 120 of you in the last day alone! Please take a seat, and enjoy one of our fine wines or French brandies. My maid is preparing membership cards and particulars as we speak.
A telegram from Gussy Herbert, on an expedition for the Empire Museum. "Have found much of great scholarly interest! Shall bring something back for you!". I do hope he forgets this promise. Previously, Gussy has brought back a Mummy's foot (left) and
Sir, Once more I find myself interviewing for a new maid. A great many did apply, and so I have implemented a new system of interview and assessment. I am now considering the final three candidates, but it is most difficult to decide between them.
